As has become our norm, Bugsy and I got our day started at 5-something A.M.
Today however started with a twist, he was doing his morning roll and suddenly I heard the *ghack*
Dang, he had thrown up a blob of food. We are super fortunate that he so rarely pukes it IS an event when he does.
And my poor sweet boy looks so upset and worried he's done something horrible.
No worries my baby boy, I love you even when you puke. Now let me finish dry heaving.
He hurried outside and did whatever he needed to do and then he wanted to cuddle. Aw he must not feel well as he doesn't ask for cuddling. I presumed he had a bit too much to eat yesterday.
I gyped him on his breakfast and he slept near my side as I worked most of the morning. Then he decided we should walk - and I sure did need it.
He trotted along and then about a mile out, he turned and looked at me and I saw that he wasn't bearing much weight on the bad left front leg when we stopped. I asked him if he wanted to go home and he turned toward home and was back to trotting.
If you didn't know that he had a bad leg (well a leg that is worse than his other bad legs), you wouldn't know it as he trots along. It is quite amazing really.
But every time he slowed or stopped I could see he was really avoiding using that leg.
Talk about a pit in my stomach.
My guess is his early morning upchuck was due to pain.
He'd had a fun day yesterday, running and romping through fields, doing his disappearing act long enough to scare me to death, only to emerge happier than one can imagine.
Later in the day he was beyond excitement when I went for a walk so I allowed him to come. He wasn't limping too badly so I thought how can it harm him.
We only got to to the top of the road when we saw a neighbor's pack out playing, Bugsy never seems to want to play with their two but they have a guest dog at the moment and it was clear from their first look that she and Bugsy were fast friends.
He played and played with her and then he just wanted to hang out there after it was clear his leg was giving up on him.
All four humans felt so sad to see him, so happy and yet so frustrated.
So strong and magnificent looking yet lame.
So today he had rimadyl and rest. I was happy to have a buddy at my side most of the day and we had a silly play session this afternoon. I must have lifted his good front leg 10x and the look in his eyes was, "please mom don't make me use this one"
He's resting now in his crate while I feel broken-hearted. I was so sure we were making progress, real progress. I have accepted that his limp and handicap is forever. But damn I hate seeing this level of pain.
I wonder if he's reinjured something or it was just too much.
Or since we can't swim maybe we are doing much walking.
Tonight I watched him run and his left (unrepaired) knee seemed gimpy.
Has that knee gone and causing him to overuse the front bad leg?
And yes I let him out to do his business and he decided to run zoomies.
To those of you who don't know him you must think, wow that dog is seriously screwed up. But he isn't, he is one of the happiest beings on earth.
Me however, I feel dark and sad and lost.
It seems so unfair that his body has failed him so.
I would give damn near anything to see him run again like he used to, he was so fast and so agile and pain-free.
Pain-free.
What I wouldn't give to see him pain-free again.
Today I realize it will never be.
I will rest him for a few days, give rimadyl, and manage the insanity that will emerge because he is being 'rested'.
I don't really know what else I can do.
I'll watch him like a hawk and take him in for xrays if things don't improve.
I have a super busy month at work ahead. Today as we laughed and played with a silly toy I thought of how much I miss him and will miss him as I toil away.
Say a few prayers for my best buddy that he isn't heading into another ortho surgery. Not sure if I can handle it
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