Thursday, January 24, 2013

Seasons of his life

The other day I went outside to warm myself in the late afternoon sun. Of course the world's nosiest dog came flying out the door pushing me put of his way as he did so.
I wore a wry smile thinking about how some things never change. We have worked so hard to increase his patience and impulse control but he's never not sprinted to push past us to get out the door first. I warn guests he'll always pass you on your right.
I don't fear it is his 'dominance' over us, there is no other indication he sees himself as dominant. He just really wants to not be left behind in case something wonderful is happening.
We don't fight it any more, haven't for years.
However, other things have changed.
It feels quite sudden but when I looked at my handsome boy, standing on the front steps surveying the cul de sac, I saw physical changes that were bound to happen but I hadn't really seen yet.
His taught body isn't as taught. His neck has slack that wasn't there.
Tiny gray hairs are populating his muzzle.
Just at that moment his coat reflecting the intense sun, I realized he really was a senior. The vet has been telling me that at his size he's been a senior since age 5.
But he didn't look it to me, no longer young? Sure. A senior? Nah.
This shoulder injury and associated pain has taken its toll.
I pray that once we are back to swimming in the lake regularly we'll see improvement in his physique and his mindset. And that will lessen the senior-like appearance.
Of course the fact will remain that he of permanent exuberance is slowing down and his body will never return to the Mr Atlas he was a youngster.
He will sleep a bit more, exercise a bit less, and thankfully eat a bit less.
We will love him with all our heart, as we have always done.
I felt quite sad about this realization of his seniorhood.
Their lives are so darn short, I abruptly realized MY fountain of youth was leaving me.
His youthfulness had tricked me into believing he was the young dog that performed such crazy feats.
The task for me now is to transition my expectations for him and make the most of this new part of our relationship.

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